I was really excited to get this book in. It took me a little while to finish it. I have to have quiet to read and there is very little quiet in house full of boys. Thankfully I found time this afternoon during nap time to finish and I'm glad I did...
When I finished reading How We Love Our Kids I was encouraged to be a better parent. I caught some insight on my flaws and how to overcome them. The book covers 5 different love styles of parenting, what those parenting styles look like as children, and unique qualities to look for in our children. I did have a little difficulty pinpointing my own love style of parenting, but when I looked over the Parent Toolbox in the back of the book it helped me better understand. It also talked about how understanding your children's feelings, validating them, and then helping them communicate their feelings is vital to their success as adults. It gave a great list of "soul word" to help describe those feelings in the Parent Toolbox.
My favorite part of the book came in the final chapters. These chapters go over the seven gifts that every child needs from their parents and how to give them. The gifts are Insights, Comfort, Power, Frustration, Confession, Laughter, and God. Each of these last chapters explain what they are and how to apply them in our families. Also, what can happen if these gifts aren't received. The final chapter covers the gift of God and was the best way to tie the book up. It talks about how we as parents have an important job in reflecting God's love to our children and how God has set up a blueprint for parenting. Milan and Kay Yerkovich pull it all together by pointing to God's word, stating that God is love and how he relates to us in 3 primary ways bringing about results only He can bring. I think I like this chapter the most because of this exert...
"God is our perfect model for parenting. If we imitate God's love as detailed in 1 Corinthians 13, we will see our kids, seeking to know them for who they are, always trying to understand and meet their deepest needs. We'll initiate relationship by entering their world and walking toward the miracle and the mess, even when our kids don't appreciate it. We'll teach them to manage the consequences of their actions, but always with the loving goal of repair and restoration of relationship. And we'll seek to find the balance of offering justice in love. At times parenting will require great sacrifice. We'll have to give up some of our freedom, endure losses, and sometimes grieve, but we must never give up trying to break down barriers that separate our kids from love. This is what God does."
This last chapter energized me as a parent. It reminded me that being a parent isn't a job...it is a ministry probably one of the most important ministries there is. We set the pace for these little ones and is not something to be taken lightly. What an incredible responsibility and gift! I am very grateful to have had the opportunity to read this book.
***I received this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah in exchange for an honest review.
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